


Never Again

by NakuNakuNoMi



Category: One Piece
Genre: Angst, Death, F/M, mentions of torture, mentions of wounds, sad fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-30
Updated: 2020-05-30
Packaged: 2021-03-02 21:15:06
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,428
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24453511
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NakuNakuNoMi/pseuds/NakuNakuNoMi
Summary: The only thing good about insomnia is that he doesn’t have to see you every night.
Relationships: Trafalgar D. Water Law & Reader, Trafalgar D. Water Law/Reader, Trafalgar D. Water Law/You
Comments: 4
Kudos: 40





	Never Again

**Author's Note:**

> Okay so I really wanted to write something angsty. And this is what came to mind. I am sorry beforehand. ( ; ω ; ) enjoy <3 (although ‘enjoy’ might not be the right thing to say)  
> Posted First on my Tumblr with the same account name.  
> Spoilers for Dressrosa arch.

_The only thing good about insomnia is that he doesn’t have to see you every night._

Law didn’t open up to people. Law had a hard time ‘loving’. He loved his family. And he lost them. He loved Corazon. And he lost him as well. He cared deeply, deeply for his crew, but he could never express it. Subtle actions to keep them out of harm’s way, getting stronger, gaining a better status, making sure they were not at the place of possibly fatal battles. But never ever expressing love. He was done with that. 

Or at least, that was what he thought. 

Then you came along, and that whole plan was thrown overboard. You had lowered his defenses without even trying. In the beginning, he wanted to say he hated you for that. But he couldn’t do that. He didn’t hate you. You just had an effect on him that he could not control, could not contain. And so he loved. 

First in silence. Maybe you’d be all right if he just treated you the way he treated his crew. Keeping you at a distance. Making sure you were safe. Then he tried hard to stop you. Making sure you understood he was a dangerous man and nothing good could ever come from loving him. Nothing worked. And the harder he tried to get out of it, the harder the two of you got pushed towards each other by fate. 

In the beginning, he was careful. The relationship a secret. Stolen kisses when nobody was around, subtle touches when passing each other in the hallways of the sub. Cleaning off an operation table together, just so you could have a private conversation without the other crew members present. Insomnia filled nights for him where you downed so much coffee you were pretty sure you’d be able to hear colors, just to stay awake and keep him company. Sneaky shared showers. 

Then it got harder and harder. The Polar Tangs is only so big and there is only so much avoiding one can do. The crew is not exactly stupid either. It took Law a while to adjust to having a relationship that people know of. But you were patient. You were so patient with him and it makes him fall for you all over again. 

The bad days were when he tried to convince you it was dangerous. His curse. How everyone he loves dies. He had a mission that might very well kill him too. He didn’t want to be the cause for any more pain. But you hold on. You kept pushing through. Promising you’d stick around no matter what. Promising you’d stay even if he thought he’s not worth it. Promising to wait if he ever needed a break. Keeping to all your promises. 

The good days were when he was carefully optimistic. That once he’d gotten rid of Doflamingo, the two of you could actually build some kind of future. He didn’t want to think about it too much, the much more likely prospect of him dying clouding his daydreams. But he was still in peace with that thought. At least you would be safe, and could start a life without his curse looming over you. 

The good days were when the crew had nothing to do and he could find a moment of rest in your arms. The nights he actually slept peacefully and even if the nightmares woke him up, you were there to softly run your fingers through his hair until he was completely calmed down and ready to fall asleep again. 

The good days were when he was done pushing you away. He was sure he couldn’t live without you anymore. He needed you as much as you said you needed him. He opened up his heart once more, hoping that this time, everything would be different. 

The goodbye was the hardest thing. He promised he’d do his utmost best to come back to you. There was nothing else he wanted more than come back to you once everything was over. To finally have peace, justice for Corazon and to be back in your arms. That would be the ideal outcome and the things he kept repeating over and over and over and over in his head. The things that kept him sane. The things that kept him going. 

Nothing could have prepared him for the reunion in Dressrosa. Not even in his most terrible nightmares had he seen you in such a state. Gagged, dirty, cuts and bruises all over your body. He didn’t need to scan your body to know some bones were broken too. Your eyes were red and puffy, your cheeks glistening with whatever was left of your dried up tears. 

Doflamingo was taking the greatest pleasure in explaining in detail what he had done to you, putting emphasis on his words by tracing a slender finger over a particularly nasty cut, your body too tired to even be properly flinching. He laughed. Whoever messed with his family, was going to get theirs messed with as well. Something Law should have known, the blond man added, and even former members were not safe from that fate at all. 

Law saw red. Whatever plan there was, was now out of the window. There is only so much levelheadedness one can keep when the one thing that keeps you sane is going to be taken away from you. He was ready to recklessly attack when he heard the familiar sound of a gun cocking and stopped dead in his tracks when he saw the barrel of the pistol in Doflamingo’s hands was firmly pressed to the back of your skull. 

He was ready to throw all his pride out of the window. To beg. To do everything Doflamingo asked of him. Anything to make this stop. Anything to save you. But he could barely open up his mouth to say something as he felt strings restraining him. Doflamingo slowly, almost gently removed the object stuffed in your mouth so you could speak freely, you gasped for air, crying out Law’s name, but it came out as a hoarse whisper, and Law wished he could take his heart out right then and there. It had never hurt like this. 

“Any last words love?” 

The sweetness in Doflamingo’s voice was overshadowed by his grin, the gunshot sound ringing in the air before you could even finish your last words. Law didn’t need to hear them all to know them though. Your body went limp and fell to the ground, the last thing leaving was the light in your eyes. Your beautiful, tearful eyes, focused on him, filled with the last emotion you had felt. Love. 

_I love you_

Your last words had been reserved for him. Even though he had been the one to place this terrible curse on you. Even though he had not been able to protect you, as he had not been able to protect the ones he loved before you. Even though he had been the reason you were in that terrible place, tortured and hurt. He had not deserved those last words, and yet you had dedicated your last moments to him. 

He felt disgusted. He felt angry. An anger he had never felt before raged through his veins. And a self-loathing, that seemed to have drenched his core. He did not deserve love. He did not deserve to love. He should never have let down his defenses around you, because you would not have been hurt. His family. Corazon. You. His fault. His curse.

His insomnia was even worse after that, every single time he closed his eyes, your last seconds were playing over and over in his brain. He couldn’t stand any silence, the gunshot sound, you crying out his name and the remnants of your final words ringing in his ears, making him so angry, lashing out at people that didn’t even do anything to warrant his rage. He could barely blink, that last look in your eyes burned into his mind’s eye. 

He was sure now. He would not open up anymore. He would not love, no, he could not love anymore. He would never put anyone through such misery. He would never hurt someone the way he had hurt you, he would stop anyone and everyone to come to close. He would even keep the crew at arm’s length. He was destined to fight fate alone. He was condemned to loneliness. To hurt. To never ever love. 

Never again. 


End file.
